Friday, January 14, 2022

The Slows

 

(In my imagination, you all would talk back to me during this little drama, but would sound like muted trombones like in the Peanuts cartoons.) 


H there!  It's me, your favorite blogger with your favorite blog.  Long time no.... bwwwaaaasbuweeeooo)

Wait, not that one, that's some other blog.  This is Terrible Loss, your OTHER favorite blog.  Anyway I've been off the internet for..(Bwwweeeeeooouuubwwaaauu)

No.  That's some other guy.  I'm Stewart, your third (fourth / fifth) favorite blogger and I'm back to blogging now tha....(bababababababuuuuuu)

LOOK.  I am in your Top Ten favorite blogs OF ALL TIME.  I was off the internets for a little longer than  month due to family and holidays and work and sickness and just didn't have the time.  You missed me deeply.  Which is, frankly a little disturbing, as I'm just some guy on the internet.  Albeit a charming one.  Now stop interrupting so we can DO THIS. 

Other excuses: I was at a work Christmas party for my estranged wife when thieves masquerading as terrorists attacked the building and took everyone hostage.  Almost sounds like a movie.  



Funny


So maybe that little skit wasn't that funny, but what is funny is that you miss blogging once you're in the habit of doing it.  (and I mean the verb form of blogging that includes writing your own posts and also reading and commenting on other's posts).   People tend to write some good stuff at the end of the year and I missed it.  I'm going through my blog roll to try and catch up with people as I type this.  So if you missed my stupid mindless blather in your comment section then it should show up soon enough.   


Though you probably didn't notice I was missing.  That's because you get way more comments than I do; because you're a better blogger than I am.  I have such a limited audience that when someone misses my post that I'm in danger of  descending into teenage girlhood... "Bethany did not like my social media post so we are NOT friends anymore and I HATE her and I'm gonna go steal her boyfriend with blowjobs!"  

--my daughter is 8 years old.  please tell me teenage girls are not like that.  I'm not sure I can cope.  I'm gonna stop typing and go do some self esteem building activities with her right now.

--I'm back.  That didn't take long.  Father of the year again I am, and it's only January. 


High Hopes and Low Motivation



The wife is working out of town every weekend in January, leaving me on children duty all by my lonesome.  This will make for some busy days.  Yet I am hopeful that during the nights after the children go to bed; I can quickly put out any lingering fires and wipe up any spills that threaten to become too sticky and then focus on hobbies. I live a very full life.  





I have so many genres I could do, but I thought that I would stick with the previously mentioned plan and try to crank out some Dark Ages miniatures to add to the Saxons and Vikings; to make mass battle games a little more mass.  The idea being that these can see the table *eventually*.   Maybe even at convention this year if they don't all get cancelled by COVID and provided my family life allows me to play.

Right now I got low motivation because I barely do any gaming.  Last year was the third in a row where I was only able to play about 12 games over the year.  Which is way lower than I'd like.
--I know that talking about how often you game can be like talking about how often you have sex and is a matter of perspective. One person says 'we have sex all the time, like once a month' and the other says 'we barely have sex at all, like once a  month!'---

But as someone like me who is strongly a 'paint to play' kinda guy; the lack of play really decreases the motivation to paint.  It's well known all over the internet that I don't truly enjoy painting miniatures for it's own sake.  I mean, I enjoy painting miniatures more than I enjoy doing chores. watching bad TV, and talking to the wife at night when she is tired and cranky.  What I enjoy about painting miniatures is having painted armies to play with and the sense of free time.  

--Curiously, I do enjoy making terrain a lot.  I have 4 books on how to make terrain but none on how to paint miniatures.  But right now I don't have any terrain needs so I'm stuck with miniatures.  Unless someone wants to paint these things for me and I'll make some terrain for them?  Kinda like a swap..
I should do model trains, because all you do in that hobby is make terrain.  Except what the hell do you do with a model train board except point at it and say "there's me trains.  Yeeeaaapp."  


But How Slow is Slow Exactly?


So the plan is add at least 80 miniatures to the Vikings and Saxons.  I'm sure I'll think of other stuff I'll want along the way so lets make it an even 100.  
100 miniatures from bare metal/plastic to table top.  It's a high goal.  And I'm off to a terrible start because I gots a real bad case of the hobby slows.   All along there have been set backs and mishaps, all along, all along there were incidents and accidents, there were hints and allegations.  



2 weeks into January, and all I've done is assemble 10 miniatures.
I do like assembling miniatures too.


So let's do an experiment and see how long it takes me to paint 100 miniatures.  Feel free to place your bets.  


Endings 


This post was high on bad jokes and low on actual miniature wargaming.  'Art imitates life' as they say.
Thanks for reading.  Double thanks for writing a comment.  

Oh, and I'm aware of the irony of stating "I have low motivation to paint right now, so I think I'll make a goal to paint to hundred miniatures."    I am a silly person. 




32 comments:

  1. Stew, your posts always bring a smile. My bet on time required for you to paint 100 figures?

    Ten months.

    Wants to take the Over/Under?

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    1. thanks JF. 10 months for 100 figures must seem like AGES to you. LOL
      I don't actually have a deadline and this doesn't even need to be done for anything, it's jus the thing I want to do. 😊

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  2. Welcome back Stew, your inane drivel has been missed by me at least! I think you did warn us in the lead up th Christmas that the holiday period would absorb all your time and to expect your absence from the web fir a while...plus that work function for your ex wife sounds a bit traumatising....seeing the ex wife I mean, not the pseudo terrorists! Now, idpf your were Dean idpf WAB Corner, you would already have the hundred figures half painted in the time it has taken me to write this response, but at ten figures every two weeks, it's going to be May before you have even assembled one hundred....so to get them painted too? I will go with 350 days!

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  3. God knows why I (and Blogger Spell check) wrote idpf instead of "if you were Dean of..." .....bloody machines. If they ever do take over the world, it's going to be very confusing!

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    1. Thanks Keith. The assembly of plastic figures does take for-ever. Glad you liked the post as well. I'm hoping that it will take me no longer than 6 months, as any more than that starts to feel depressing. 😊

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  4. I think one of the things that has hit you has been the disruption to the show circuit, since you used to put on a game and had all the prep to do, which was no doubt engaging and something to look forwards to.

    I think your 100 figures will be the best part of this years project. I have just done a regiment of Union ACW and they have been on painting sticks for 10 days, doing 60m- 90 minutes a day, so the brain and eye says I’ll do a quick job on these and then the hand doesn’t get that message and it takes ages.

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    1. thanks Norm. You're correct there that around this time I pick a convention and start prepping for it and the last 2 years I've had none. Don't know about this year either with so many variant viruses going around. BUT there is a convention in the beginning of September that it might be nice to go to as it's not too large, so having my mass battle dark ages all ready could come in handy,,,😊

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  5. I've blogged on my hobby mojo deficiencies a number of times when they've struck, so I get the lack of motivation. It sucks, but it's not always for very long. To help with that, you should hold your own wargames expo or some such - call it StewCon, has a nice ring to it. Get your offspring to work the ticket table and concessions stand and you have all the help you'll need, you just need to bring the tables and games.

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    1. O and 100 minis to assembled and fully painted? April.

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    2. Thanks Dai. By April? I that would be nice.
      funny you should mention it though; but for my birthday my wife gave me a coupon (we're big on homemade coupons around here) for a "gaming weekend,' with the suggestion that I even book a suite in a hotel to host it. Maybe if it's cool enough I could even entice you to make the trip out and play....😊

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    3. Depending on date and location mate. All depending on those...

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  6. Strangely (to me at least) there are people who make model train boards, and then run them as sort of a roleplaying game, with way tickets, and phone calls and the whole bit.

    I am sure that they think that rolling dice and moving figures around is strange too.

    Maybe what you need for motivation is a change in projects? Put the Vikings on the back burner for a week or two, and make up a few ships, or paint space marines or something.

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    1. Thanks Laz. I suppose there must be some way to play with model trains….

      It’s not so much the particular painting project that is getting to me; it’s the overall lack of playing in general that is. Why paint anything if it’s not likely to see the table anytime soon?
      But really it’s just me moaning a bit. Most people probably don’t play as much as they would like. 😀

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  7. This all sounds very familiar, hope you get back into it this year Stew. I need to get started too, as need some more figures for a game this October, might just get them done at the rate I currently paint at.

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    1. Thanks Tony. Probably a familiar state of affairs for most gamers at some time. Good luck with your own painting. 😀

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  8. We DID miss you! I think the "slows" are in the air for many, what with the holidays and the Omicron Covid Wave (who isn't tired of the damn pandemic?). Drop a few lines when you can; don't make it hard (I should follow this advice myself!). We'll be your bodyguard, and once you paint those 100 minis, we'll call you Al :)

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    1. Thanks Ed. Good advice. And WELL SPOTTED. I threw that bit in there for my own amusement but I’m happy that someone else recognized. 😀

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  9. Goals are good. I like goals. But, you know, it's a hobby. So, if you don't hit the goal, don't beat yourself up. I am slowly learning not to push. Paint what you feel like painting, and if you don't, then get caught up on video games, or bad TV, or reading, or whatever. Good to have you back.

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    1. Thanks Markus. I never feel like I want to paint anything; I feel like I want stuff painted. (If that makes sense).
      But yes, there need not be pushing myself bc there’s no real deadline to worry about and if I wander off to another project then no real harm done.
      Except that I set a goal. And I like achieving goals. I feel like that doesn’t happen much after age 40. 😀

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  10. I don't know what you're talking about, Stew. This is my favorite blog of all time! Easily! I come for the humor and stay for the existential thoughts :) I think I would hire you to make terrain for me because I'm the opposite and can't get enough miniature painting and yet, I find terrain tedious. Even when I make something I really like, I don't enjoy the process necessarily. I guess we all have some part of the hobby we have to do whether we love it or not!

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    1. Thanks Jeff. You are too kind. You’re also correct but too kind. 😀
      I suppose that there’s something for us all that is not our favorite. Just stuff that needs to be done.
      Maybe one day we could work out a trade….

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    2. Its funny you mention that because I was looking at the crops I made for Farmer Maggot's field forever ago now and thinking, I should give them to you because you might actually use them. I'm afraid mine will just sit around unused for years to come. I'll give it some more thought and follow up with you on this at some point in the future :)

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    3. That be very generous of you. But there are no crops in Fallout? I’m sure they’d come in useful eventually.
      You worked hard at those; I’d have to give something in return…😀

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    4. There are definitely crops in Fallout but they aren't surrounded by grassy areas, if you know what I mean. I might be able to strip off all of the grass on them and redo it but I think the piece makes more sense in normal grassland type setting in the first place. You don't need to send me anything in return necessarily. I'd mostly just be glad they're going to a good place (and that they aren't taking up space here too!) :)

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  11. Your blogging output is certainly superior to mine and I bet so is your painting rate. It would take me up to next Christmas minimum to paint a hundred so I’m putting my money that you’d do much better. I say you’ll get your mojo back big time and get them done by summer, say July?

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    1. Thanks Mike. At this rate it’s gonna take me till October so I’m not that much faster. And my painting quality is definitely less. 😀

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  12. What, so you've been away? Assembling plastic figures does take time,I started painting 48 Napoleonic infantry figures just after Christmas, should be finished next week or at worst the week after,my speed painted types, I'll say by the end of summer is when I think you'll finish, I'm lucky I don't need gaming motivation to paint, I just trundle along, although when I play a game/have to prep for one I do get enthusiastic for the period usually!
    Best Iain

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    1. Thanks Iain. By summer might be giving me too much credit. 😀
      Hopefully got me I’ll be able to schedule a few games here and there to keep up my motivation. I think we all get an extra burst when games are scheduled. 😀

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  13. Pretty funny start here Stew. I feel for your slows, I get them all the time. I have always tried to deal with them by changing things up, sometimes just a slight change, sometimes a drastic change. Like now I've just finished one and committed to another project I don't enjoy, which is making me really itch to get back to my ships!
    Always enjoy your posts my friend.
    Best regards

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    1. Thanks Vol. I suppose there could be such a thing as the quicks but I don’t recall ever having a case. Good luck on your Kazad doom bridge. 😀

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  14. That's one of the most enjoyable rambles on a blog that I have read for ages. Most enjoyable.
    I am right there with you, as one who also paints figures that will see the table 'eventually' (albeit for slightly different reasons; in my head at least!).
    Regards, James

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    1. Thanks James, appreciate the comment. Glad you enjoyed it. I try to entertain a little on my blog just bc the painting is so poor and slow. 😀

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